HAIRLESS CAT

My sister suggested I get a hairless cat. I think this is one of the lowest points my life has hit in a while. The assumption was having this disgusting creature share my home would cheer me up. Things are pretty bad when a loved one intimates that the most atrocious thing you’ve ever seen might improve your situation.

The inspiration for this sisterly advice was an innocent pix message. I’d had a blah day at work. I was sitting on the couch watching episodes of The Real World. I should be ashamed of myself for enjoying that garbage. While I fast-forwarded through a commercial I took a picture of myself with my camera phone because I was bored. It was so impossibly unflattering that I felt it was too good (by good I mean bad) to erase. I knew there must be some use for it. So I sent it to Lizzy with the caption “This is how I look when I miss you.” Before my boredom sunk me even further (that means watching the episodes of The Hills I had dvr’ed), she called me and we had a nice giggle over how unbelievably ugly the pic was and how she assumed it was me trying out halloween costume. Nope, it was just plain old me after a long day at work, hair ruined by humidity, make-up half taken off by a soak in the tub plus a very very bad angle. I told her about my blah day and how I was not necessarily lonely or bored, just… something. She said “Maybe you need a roommate.” No, I am done with those. She said “A friend?” I have friends. Emphatically she exclaimed, “Get an anim- no, you’re too busy… but maybe a cat… you’re allergic… How about a HAIRLESS cat!?”