I just wanted to say “Thanks.” I don’t know why you picked me, maybe it’s because I need you so much? Dan sometimes shakes his head and asks me, “How did you live before you met me?” Not because he is arrogant or anything like that, far from it! Just because he is pretty responsible, and I am… not irresponsible, but just more, I don’t know what you call it. “Scattered” evokes the image of a lady running errands with a stray curler left in the back of her head. Not scattered. And not disorganized… just needing a lot of Post-It notes or something.
It feels like every time I turn around, I am losing something or forgetting something. Like yesterday, we were about to get on the highway to head to Boston Logan when I realized I had left my phone at my parents’. That would have sucked if I’d forgotten it!!! Anyway, Dan doesn’t realize perhaps that yes, he helps me a lot, but even before there was Dan, there was you, my angel, making sure my whole life didn’t go to hell in a handbasket, and at the very least, keeping me safe from identity theft, just because I am a bit careless at times.
I don’t mean to be cocky, but after over 30 years of this, I worry less because I just sort of know you will take care of me. I know, you are shaking your head like “Worry less!? The best part of all this is watching you curse and dump out your purse like 10 times while you flip out!” Did you think it was funny this week, watching me lose my sh*t when I couldn’t find my license?! Honestly, I don’t blame you if you thought it was a riot, watching me make a dozen phone calls, photocopy our engagement and wedding announcements, get my mom to dig out my birth certificate, and attempt to get to the airport extra early (which I would have if we hadn’t had to go back for my cel phone) in case I needed time to convince the TSA of my identity, only to find my license had been sitting at the Southwest office at Denver Int’l Airport for over a week, even though they were all “We would have mailed it our Dallas headquarters within 24 hours of finding it”!? Seriously, I was not only dreading having to spend this morning at the DMV, but also- my license picture with my new last name turned out CUTE, and I wasn’t sure a new pic would be as attractive.
But then there was that time, remember in 2008, when Dan and I went to Philly for my friends’ wedding, and I must have dropped my license in security, who knows… I ended up getting a new one right away (with an even cuter pic than the first one), and then the airline mailed me my old license within a weeks’ time. That was sweet because I had a spare ID, which came in handy more than once.
What about that time in graduate school, I had a bit too much fun celebrating the end of the semester the night before my flight home for Christmas break!? Remember how I passed out in my clothes, and I woke up when my friend walked in my apartment the next morning and I was still asleep even though it was time for her to drive me to the airport!? I was so frazzled, I forgot my purse, but the beauty of the whole thing was my drivers’ license was still in the pocket of the pants I never bothered to change!
Which reminds me of the time in Vegas, I had to return to Pure the next night when they opened again because I had left without closing out the tab (don’t ask), and after a lot of problems, the main one being I was having a hard time even locating the entrance of the club, because Caesar’s Palace is BIG and my sense of direction is BAD, and then when I finally got everything sorted out, they returned my credit card AND my license, which I didn’t even know I had lost!
Also, thanks for making sure no one stole my huge leather purse, which included my wallet and my passport when I left it at that cafe in Costa Rica. OMG, were you dying when Dan and I drove 2 hours to return the rental car, it was POURING down rain, and I had to tell Dan we had to go back to that place we ate lunch, the place whose name started with an “M,” except we didn’t remember anything else, except that it was on the lefthand side of the road, because I totally forgot my purse!? And then I had to make Dan drive most of the way, even though he’d already been driving basically all day, because I am a total grandma when it comes to night driving!? It wasn’t funny at the time, but it’s kind of funny now. The best part was, when I walked into the place, and no one spoke English, but the guy at the bar pointed at me and gestured about a big square, and then I nodded, and he brought out my bag from the back, completely intact!
Or what about that time I was working out at the Wellness Center, like a hundred years ago when I lived in Chapel Hill, and when I got back to my car, my purse, which was supposed to have been in the car, was totally not there and I realized I had left my passenger window wide open and I wigged out because obviously someone had reached in and just grabbed it. Remember how I was feeling like such an idiot when I went up to the front desk to borrow the phone to call the police, and then the reception lady held up the floral bag and she was like “Is this it?” Some awesome person saw that my window was wide open with the purse on the passenger side so they brought it in for safe keeping.
And that same purse- you must love that purse as much as I do (except can you help me find the matching mini-bag that goes with it, I haven’t seen that in years!), because of that time I left it at the Starbucks at Wadsworth and Alameida. That was crazy, the whole day went by and it was like 9pm when I realized it was missing and that was the last place I’d had it, at like 8:30 that morning. I called up and sure enough they had it but I didn’t feel like schlepping 45 minutes to get it that night, when I would practically be down the street the next morning for work. I felt the Starbucks lady had a nice vibe about her and that my purse would be safe till the next morning, and when I got there the next morning, before I could even say “Double shot Americano with a shot of steamed soy in a 16 oz cup,” the lady looked at me and yelled “Flower Power!” (a nod to the wacky flower print on the bag), as if I were just another regular, even though that was only the second time I’d ever been in there. As usual, nothing was even missing!
And don’t think I forgot about the time I lost my hospital ID badge this fall. It wasn’t just my ID badge, but also my Eco-Pass and a nearly full $20 cash card for the cafeteria that I lost. You have been so good to me, but I never expected you would figure out a way for someone to have returned all that stuff to the emergency room, and that the receptionist there would have contacted me within 24 hours, before I even had time to go to HR for a new badge and to try to beg for a new Eco-Pass!
And the bus pass I lost in graduate school- that was worth like $200 and somehow I lost it… On the very day I was ready to bite the bullet and buy a new one, someone from… was it the Safety office? Who knows, they called me to tell me someone had turned in my bus pass.
And that whole thing with my cel phone, remember when I left it in the hotel in Silverthorne and I worried I would never see it again, but then the hotel guy eventually mailed it me and I did get it, albeit 10 days later… That was a close one!
Anyway, all of this to say, I haven’t forgotten all the times you have come to my aid, helping to return all the important things I have lost track of. Thank you!!!
4 thoughts on “Dear Guardian Angel,”
Your guardian angel needs more than just a thank you letter–we should be getting him (or is it a her?) a yearly ‘thank you’ gift.Dan
i miss you pam-tina
You kill me. So hilarious. Good angel, by the way.
What a wonderful, light-hearted, and funny post. Dan is quite an angel, indeed. You have an great relationship. Thanks for sharing – reading this post made me smile from start to end.