What Women Don’t Want You To Know About Writing Groups

I finally got around to organizing a writing group. I’ve only been meaning to do this for… oh, I don’t know say, ever? Just like the hardest part of a run is tying your shoes, the hardest part of getting it going was.. getting it going.

But get it going we did. Between bites of melting gelato, swapping book recommendations, and sharing our barriers to creativity (PS if you don’t loathe yourself sometimes you’re not really an artist), we came up with a lot of amazing ideas.

And somehow the conversation kept snaking it’s way back to sex. One minute we were talking about how important it is to say “F*ck you” to anyone who shits on your dream. The next we were sharing our thoughts on what is an age appropriate way to to tell your seven year old about the mechanics of intercourse.

We pulled the conversation back to the pain of sitting down at one’s computer and feeling like there is just nothing to write, but again the conversation meandered back to sex. Because writing is just like sex; even though you might not be in the mood to get started, you’re always glad you did afterward. Which is why you should write often. Did I mention we are all women? But I guess I don’t need to now that you know where we stand on this frequency of writing/sex analogy.

Just when we got things on track again, discussing the pain of asking one’s self Who am I to write this? and coming up with nothing and deciding to quit because Obviously I’m a loser and I have nothing good to say, we moved right back to sex. Because when it comes to sex, you can’t come to the bedroom expecting to have the hottest, steamiest time of your life. Your expectations alone are enough to kill the mood. Instead, you need to relax, enjoy the experience, and see what happens.

The same goes for writing. You can’t sit down and expect to write something amazing. You will surely come up with nothing if you put that much pressure on yourself. You can only sit down to write, let the words hit the page (or the screen) and see what comes of it.

Here’s to the process. 

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