The most meaningful 800 words I’ve written

I alluded to the article I wrote for Colorado Runner Magazine a couple of posts ago, and I think we need to come back to that. I am excited about it not just because it’s a thrill to see my name in print. And not just because I got paid to do something I love to do. My little article’s appearance in a small magazine was something I worked really hard for. Maybe it could have been easier, and maybe it could have happened a lot sooner, but it if was and if it had, it wouldn’t be such a big deal to me.

Years ago, I told a friend who was a freelance writer that I was interested in getting into that line of work. She told me my blog was cute and that it was a very hard industry to break into.  Me being me (eg way too sensitive), I thought she was telling me not to bother and I was embarrassed for even bringing it up. I kept blogging and I enjoyed writing but I stopped entertaining the idea of getting paid to write. Meanwhile, Dan, my mom, and my sister were telling me that they loved my writing and why couldn’t I be a writer, and as much as I appreciated and still appreciate the encouragement, I was also was like, “Whatever, you are related to me/married to me, not the New York Times Book Review editor.”

Then, last year, I co-produced Boulder’s Listen To Your Mother Show and I had the opportunity to connect with the other producers and directors of Listen To Your Mother Shows across the country, many of whom write for a living. I met these women and other inspiring people at the BlogHer Conference in 2013. And I decided, for reals, I wanted to get paid to write.

I don’t know what it’s like for other writers, so I am speaking for myself here. Writing, particularly submitting your writing for publication, can be very scary. I fear I will have nothing to write about, or nothing that anyone else would be interested in reading. I fear I will set aside precious time to write and I will dither it away on Facebook, shopping on Amazon or deleting some of the 1241 emails sitting in my inbox. I fear I will fail to start to write.  I fear that if I start, I will fail to finish. I fear even saying the words “I am a writer” will make me sound like a fraud.

So, my little piece on treadmill running is more than just an article to me. It’s something that was published in a real, albeit small, magazine seven years after I started this blog, which was born out of a desire to write. The check came in the mail six months after I decided I would like to get paid for writing. This article is validation of my desire to get paid for my writing.

This article is a big fat middle finger to my fears and insecurities.

6 thoughts on “The most meaningful 800 words I’ve written

  1. Nina says:

    I 100% get this from your reaction to the “cute blog” comment (I don’t think you were oversensitive, that was demeaning) to your fear of sending things to wanting to get paid. 2013 was my first year getting paid for articles. The paychecks are NOT big, but they sure are nice to get. Congrats on the article!

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