What you don’t know could really gross you out

I have a few vices. They include coffee, chocolate/cookies/cake/anything sweet except hard candies although Werther’s Originals are acceptable, really bad reality shows like The Real World and The Hills, and the worst of all, reading blogs. What kind of blogs you ask? Mostly triathlon blogs. Usually triathlon blogs of people faster than me (that leaves my options wide, wide open), often those of elite amateur or professional triathletes, or any that are just plain old funny. I’m no bloggist however. I am an equal opportunity blog reader. I am guilty of reading blogs that just suck. You know, blogs where the author doesn’t know how to spell or use spell check, doesn’t understand how to use punctuation, and/or says things that are just plain old inappropriate? As one blogger of whose writing I am quite fond once pointed out, when blogging, one needs to remember that he/she is essentially mailing a postcard to the ENTIRE WORLD. Whether some bloggers don’t know this or don’t care is inconsequential, I suppose. Reading their blogs is like watching a train wreck. You want to stop but you can’t tear yourself away. Same as watching Desperate Housewives of Orange County. Just saying…

Beside triathlon blogs, I like to read anything funny and those that are written by my friends. But when you are reading stuff your friends wrote, you don’t get to enjoy that fun voyeuristic feeling, considering you probably are privy to whatever their thoughts are anyway. That is definitely the case with my boyfriend’s blog(s). For one thing we spend lots and lots of time together. I tell him all the details of my life, everything from “I had to pee in another cup for work today” to “I feel like a sandwich from Dish” to “At 1:13 today, when I was at work, I coughed.” That latter might be an exaggeration but I am a details person when it comes to information. When I give it, I give a lot of it and when I get it, I want everything. Like, when people say “TMI” I shake my head a little and go “huh!?” in my head. What even is that? Too much information? That’s like saying “My raise was too generous” or “I finished that race too fast.” As in, that totally makes no sense.

Anyway, I take it for granted that Dan shares everything with me, too. I assume that he does and then I get all surprised when I find out something that I think I should have already known. Like Tuesday, he told me he had lunch with his dad. After the fact. I was like “What? Spur of the moment? Like, last minute, he just happened to be in Boulder.” No, they were planning it. Huh? Why did I not know this!? Was this really important, Dan wanted to know… I guess not. There were blogs of strangers I had to check anyhow. No, no, I conceded, this was not actually so high on the importance scale.

Despite the fact that Dan failed to inform me of his lunch plans with his father in advance, my trust in him did not waver. I could say at this time that I don’t check his blogs as often as I should because I am confident that he shares his important, interesting thoughts and insights with me in person, therefore I should not need to go digging around on the internet. The truth however is that a) He never updates his personal blog (although he did once since he met me and the blog post was mostly ABOUT me so I loved it) b) His tech blog, I just don’t get it. It’s about software. The only thing I get as far as software is concerned is that its what your computer does while hardware is what your computer is. Also sometimes I wish I did software professionally because it can be lucrative and you can do it in your pajamas. And finally c) I don’t read his vermicomposting blog that much because its kind of low on my bookmarks dropdown but actually, it is pretty interesting.

So, imagine my surprise when I was checking the vermicomposting blog the other night and I saw this. Scroll down a little and you will see what looks like your everyday, run of the mill compost bin. Even though Dan doesn’t always tell me everything I get the gist of the important stuff. I knew he was composting human hair. I remember when he was going around to different hair salons this fall to obtain hair for this project. Creepy? Eccentric? Yeah a little, but what can I say, I love the guy.

The wheels in my head started turning as I read the post and stared at that picture. I know that bin. I know that end table… but from where? His kitchen? No. Living Room? Uh uh. Bedroom? OH. MY. GOD. That bin sits a mere 3 feet from where I sleep!!!!! Between my side of the bed and the wall!! GROSS!!!!!! GROSS!!!!!! GROSS!!! He thought he told me, he said. He swore I knew what was in that bin. Didn’t he tell me? Um, no. I think I would have remembered that. He was sure I helped him slide it under there. No, that must have been someone else. That bin was not bothering me at all until I read that post. For the first time in my life… I think I get TMI.

8 thoughts on “What you don’t know could really gross you out

  1. tina says:

    you must be in love b/c that is just plain disgusting (sorry dan). ps. speaking of blogs…as a reader who has no life of my own, i suggest some people (i.e. you) update more often. i’d rather read a crap blog than keep seing the same headline everytime i click on a link…just saying

  2. tina says:

    ps….not saying your blog is a crap blog but i agree that we know there are some out there…and i read ’em…i find your’s well written and highly entertaining..no really i do:)

  3. Javier says:

    The Bin does sound a bit …um interesting.As for when you read friends Blogs, do you find yourself also correcting them because you are privy to whats going on, so if they forget something in a story they are saying, mentally you correct them? I do, I never tell them, but It happens.

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